PREMARITAL DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

Spiritual Atmosphere:

What was the spiritual atmosphere in your home?

How well do you relate to each other spiritually?

My spiritual beliefs are important to me?

Are you satisfied with how we express our spiritual beliefs and values to each other?

Financial Responsibility:

Are you a spender or a saver?

Who in your family took care of the finances?

How do you feel about debt? Is a little debt okay? 

Who'll be responsible for your finances? 

Will you have a budget? Joint checking or separate banking account?

Conflict Resolution:

How did your parents handle conflict (yelling, silent treatment, discussion, etc...)? Are you a fighter or a lover?

Do you like to deal with the conflict head on/right away or do you need a time out to think about it, then come back to deal with it?

How do you currently resolve issues now ? Does it seem to work? Are there ways for improvement?

Domestic Duties:

Growing up who did most of the house work? How much were you responsible for?

How do you anticipate dividing home responsibilities (cooking, laundry, yard work, dishes, bathrooms, etc...)?

Are you a messy person or a clean fanatic?

Children:

Do you agree on how many children you both desire?

Have you discussed the responsibilities of raising children? How will you discipline?

Will children change our lifestyle?

Does a religious upbringing play an important role in raising your children?

What values do you wish your children to have?

Marriage Expectations:

Do you feel that most of the difficulties you've experienced before marriage have either resolved themselves or will fade away?

How will you assist your spouse as difficulties from both past and present occur?

Do you expect over time the romantic love in your relationship to fade somewhat? How can you keep the fire burning?

Time and Leisure Activities:

Do you both find it easy to agree on doing things together or do they differ (movies, hiking, restaurants etc...)?

Are you more into quality or quantity time?

Are you an introvert or extrovert? How would you go about meeting that need?

Communication:

On a scale of 1 to 10, how well do you communicate? 

Is there an area of your communication that needs improvement?

Which one of you needs more time to communicate in order to feel connected?